Coming out of an awesome weekend of being in community with women from my church in Corvallis and giving myself a time of reflection, I have come to realize the need to recognize my strengths, weaknesses, where and how I have grown, and in what ways I need to continue to grow.
Here is a reflection of realization that I found coming out of this weekend:
I am stubborn.
From that comes my strength and determination.
On the other hand, from this also comes getting stuck in my ways, habits... not always listening like I should.
From this stubbornness comes being a perfectionist and being unhappy with unmet goals and expectations.
I need to learn to find BALANCE. To focus and strengthen good things that come from being stubborn and to be able to let go of the weaknesses when needed in order to take care of myself and hear, really hear what's being said to me (from God, from those who care about and love me, from my body).
I can also be fiercely independent and have a heart to serve and take care of others. Not necessarily a bad thing in that this has led me to be self-sufficient and has allowed me to find my passion of service and serving others. But in that, I have also lost a sense of balance when it comes to [really] taking care of myself. And in some ways, my struggle to LISTEN to God and to my own needs has been pushed aside.
With this in mind, I not only need to love on others, but let others love on me. Let them in. Let them hear my struggles and hurt. Let God in. Let Him listen. Yes, He may already know... but He wants me to not only acknowledge them myself, but to actually say them out loud.
And not forgetting to try to live in the moment as much as I can and be happy with where I am at in that moment. Remembering that although the goals are important, the journey to get there is just as important.
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With this reflection, I needed to write down not only for myself but for others to see as well. My hope in recording this reflection is that it will not only force me to keep myself accountable, but allow others in to help keep me accountable as well.
Thanks for reading, everyone!
